[identity profile] mhaille.livejournal.com posting in [community profile] agingpunks
God, I look like such a friggin' TOOL lately.

Our admin (aka Vexing Minion) has been dressing waaaaay inappropriate. See-through tanks (hi, not only can I see the color and pattern of your bra, I think I can make out the size. By reading the tag.), leggings, button down shirts that don't quite button, and the dread Visible Muffin Top.

(I mean, I have pants that give me muffin top. We all do, unless we're lithe and 17, in which case GTFO of this comm and enjoy it while it lasts. This is why I only pair my too-small pants with boring, LOOSE, structured button downs that hide it.)

Bosslady is 80s preppie, through and through. She used to be a stewardess, and, quite frankly, I think she'd wear blue eyeshadow even if it weren't mandatory. And she's counting on me to lead the charge of appropriate business casual office wear.

1. No, seriously, stop rolling around laughing.
2. The words "business casual" strike any sensible person with dread and nausea.
3. Me + polo shirt = Which way to the lesbian golfing tournament, ma'am?

I have a handful of dresses that work. Black wrap shirtdress, black microknit faux-wrap, black frilly babydoll, black microknit with sweetheart neckline- throw my green or pink cardi over any of them, et voila. (I absolutely have to wear sleeves- besides the tats, I have inherited the Shea tendency to bulky upper arms.)

I have nice slacks, including several that actually fit without muffin top. I have exactly two button down shirts that fit right, two pencil skirts, oh and no work appropriate flats, just the hippie jesus sandals.

Long story short, every day I go to work looking like a 40 year old lesbian.

I want FUN HAIR. I want clothes with a bit of flair to them. What do I buy, at the awesome thrift store sale today? One button down, one sweater set, one corduroy blazer, one floor length olive drab pintucked skirt. I want to get away with pushing the envelope, and Vexing Minion is making it so we both have to toe the boring, conservative line.

I also want to be mistaken for 10 years YOUNGER, not OLDER, goddamn it.
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agingpunks: (Default)
For The Goth Punk Hippie of a Certain Age

May 2012


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